12. Snowboarding — Sixty to Sixty

Snowboarders look so cool surfing down the slope, effortlessly shifting their weight to turn one way and then the other. I used to ski; surely the skills transfer. How hard could it be?

Hard. Very, very hard.

This video best sums up my snowboarding experience:

My friend Julie and I drove up to Ragged Mountain in Danbury, NH, about a two hour drive from home, to take advantage of their Bebe Wood Free Learn to Ski and Ride Program. This is an unbelievable deal. If you’ve never skied or snowboarded before, they offer three 2-hour classes for free, including equipment rental. I figured I qualified as a novice since I haven’t skied in about 20 years.

When I used to ski in the olden days, no one wore a helmet. I asked the guy at the equipment rental desk if I really needed one, and he looked at me like I had two heads. Good thing they’re now required; one of the many spills I took landed me on my back and my head banged against the packed snow. Not a problem with the helmet on.

We started on a little bunny hill with barely a slope. Our instructor, Stanley, a sweet 20-something who aspires to working with special needs kids, showed us how to buckle our boots into the bindings, how to stand up, how to use one foot to push ourselves along.

Then we had to buckle both feet in. Gulp. This feels so constrictive, never mind that every time you want to take a lift you have unbuckle one of your boots then buckle it back up once you’re off the lift.

Stanley showed us how to turn, on one side putting your hips forward and digging your toes in, on the other sitting back and digging in your heels. “It’s all in the hips,” he said. I could do the heel side turns (sort of, with several falls), but toe side proved harder.

Julie and I both spent a lot of time on our behinds, but we could mostly stay upright for one turn. A ski instructor passing by said, “You guys are crushing it!” Nice confidence boost, but “muddling through with great effort and occasionally making a turn without falling” seems a more apt description.

Stanley eventually took us off the baby hill to the other side of the lift, to a slightly steeper but intimidating bunny hill. After turning both “heel” and “toe” for a couple of runs, Julie decided to retire her board, pull her book out of her backpack and find a fireplace. I wanted to keep going; I guess those squats I’ve been doing were paying off.

Another instructor temporarily without any students saw me struggling and came over to help. He showed me exactly where to put my weight, when to push my hips to the side or forward and when to sit back. Stanley had told me all of this, but for some reason it clicked with the step by step instruction this other guy gave me. I made it down the hill, turning both ways, without falling. Victory! Sadly, I can’t show off; don’t have that run on tape. I do have this, though:

I took a couple more runs, once again falling at almost every turn. I could feel my muscles starting to shake. Time to call it a day.

Snowboarding looks mega fun once you know how to do it. Learning ain’t pretty, though. I’m glad I tried it, but I’ll be leaving this one to the young’uns.

Ragged Mountain’s Bebe Wood Learn to Ski and Ride Program: Free!